I’ve never tried one of these link roundup things before, but there’s just too much for me to tackle in individual posts. My adult-guardian-for-life XFE will be going out of town on a work trip this weekend, so I will, of course, hole myself up in the house, eat too much cheese, and watch too many hours of whatever new show Andy Cohen has dreamed up. Or, maybe I’ll put on my big girl pants and venture out for cicada-cocktails. You never know. Have a good weekend!

• Bravo, Bravo. XFE in particular is very excited about the newest show to emerge from Andy Cohen’s brain. Now, can we please bring back “Gallery Girls?”
• A New Zealand activist is trying to rid the country of pet cats, saying their natural born killers. Well, duh. Anyone who’s seen Petunia attack a bowl of kibble would know that. Related: I’m starting a Gareth Morgan Must Go movement.
• I didn’t always stay in luxurious hotels when I travelled. Pre-XFE, I stayed in places very similar to this one, minus the glowing reviews.
• When I took Spanish in college, it always confused me that nouns were gender-specific. So this list of unnecessarily gendered products is very helpful. Now I know that only certain types of scotch tape are for girls.
• These photos of the Hong Kong Mandarin Oriental in the 1960s totally makes me want to go back to Hong Kong. But not the 60s. Just look at those complicated hair styles! Hello, headache.
• Then I read crap like this and think, “Ugh. Nevermind.” (h/t Girls of a Certain Age)
• 57 cans of whipped cream, six steaks and a birthday cake? My kind of party.
• Speaking of munchies, we’re expecting a cicada invasion this summer. National Geographic offers up some recipes for these low-carb, gluten-free buggers.
• And the DC Ritz Carlton will be offering up a drink in honor of the cicadas. I’m sure it’s quite reasonably priced.
• My friend Sara, (who doesn’t have a blog but totally should — she works in a zoo, y’all! A real zoo! Her clients are real animals! It’s not a euphemism) posted this story about a blind dog getting a seeing-eye cat on Facebook. Cue the Poe blubbering.