Category: opinions (big book of)
-
Science is Cool: Depraved Penguins and Horny Beetles
Despite the dulcet tones of Morgan Freeman, penguins are not very nice. In fact, they’re some dirty little buggers. OK, I understand that March of the Penguins was about Emperor, and the new information that’s come to light is about Adelie penguins, but a penguin is a penguin in my book. (Funny sidenote: I first…
-
Petunia’s Future as a Flying Feline
Sometimes, I’m given to bouts of melancholy. The blues, if you will. Pity party, table for one. This is particularly true when I think about life without my sweet Princess Petunia Potpie. I know cats don’t last forever. Particularly overweight, lazy cats like my little Toons. And when I think about it, I get quite…
-
Stop Eating Each Other!
Fellow civilized people of the world: Can we just make a pact right now? Can we just agree not to eat each other? Please. It’s getting ridiculous. And I don’t appreciate our government having to waste time and taxpayer dollars reassuring people that there’s not a zombie apocalypse happening. Although, I must say, the evidence…
-
I Guess That ‘Here Comes the Bride’ is a Pretty Catchy Jam
Poor Reese Witherspoon. Parents are, indeed, a neverending embarrassment. According to several media reports, Reese Witherspoon’s dad got married back in January. But before you pull out the congratulatory champagne, keep in mind: he wasn’t divorced from Reese’s mother. The Tennessean had the story first on Thursday: The Hollywood star’s mother, Mary Elizabeth Witherspoon, who…
-
Reality Time: Getting in Touch with My Redneck Roots via Duck Dynasty
It’s Sunday afternoon and we’re watching the Talladega Sprint Cup. We don’t usually watch NASCAR, but it’s a lazy Sunday afternoon and we’ve done just about everything else we needed to do this weekend, so it seems like a suitable pastime at 4:30 on a Sunday afternoon. I’m only watching it because they have a…
-
Maybe Petunia Can Get Some Sexy Tips from Luc Carl
I was going to blog about this pet photo contest going on over at Kimpton Hotels and ask everyone to vote for my petite princess Petunia Potpie, but since there’s this cheating dog wearing bunny ears named Ice who basically racked up an impossible 250 votes in less than six hours, I’m not going to…
-
Wedding Weekend Blowout
As predicted on Friday, this weekend was a debacle. Lots and lots of excess and bad decisions on my part. And conveniently, there are no photos of me since both of my camera batteries died. Oh well! (But I do have a few photos of the wedding and the happy couple) Here’s a partial list…
-
This Makes Us The Last Unmarried Couple in the World
What the What? Angelina Jole and Brad Pitt are engaged? When the hell did this happen? I admit I’ve been distracted this week. My boss is out on vacation and left me to run a global multmedia empire all by myself. And when I say “global,” I mean maaaaaaybe a couple of thousand readers. When…
-
One Night In Bangkok Probably is Actually Sufficient
Oh Bangkok. I wanted to love you. I adore Thai food. You have such pretty architecture. And, one of my absolute favorite songs of the 1980’s extols your, erm, seedier aspects, shall we say? A song, which Wikipedia tells me, has been covered by a Norwegian singer, a Swedish pop group, a Swiss DJ and…
-
Buy Some Crafts, Save a Life
I got this flyer in the mail the other day. At first glance, it seems like a nice, innocent marketing flyer announcing the imminent arrival of spring and urging residents to consider shopping at some of the nearby shops (as if I need urging). There’s some flowers blooming, but instead of flower heads there’s some…